How to deal with the haters
What do you do when you're an artist, you've put yourself out there on Instagram and… someone posts something nasty about what you're creating? Sadly, this happens to all of us. In this post I’m sharing two fabulous reels from artists Elise Judd and Ange Miller, who offer perspectives that sometimes we need to hear, no matter the stage in our art career. I also share how you can find more ‘lovers’ and ditch the ‘haters’.
Here is a recent reel that Australian artist Elise Judd posted. You can click on the image to view the reel. I love her very practical thoughts on how to deal with people who don’t appreciate what we are making.
Here is a reel from US artist Ange Miller. You can click on the image to view the reel. When she shared her tips on how to sell more art (do check out her tips on her Insta reel) she got this public comment about her art from another artist.
I love that both of these artists courageously shared their experience - and their thinking - when people decided to tell them they don’t like their art. Sadly, both of these comments were from other artists.
The thing is, not everyone will like our art, and that is absolutely okay. Some examples from outside of art: Not everyone loves oysters, but I think they are yummy as anything. So personal taste goes into what we decide to like. Not everyone likes vegemite either - an Australian condiment that most people who are not from Australia are enormously confused by, but most Australians have in the pantry and LOVE. So upbringing and culture is a part of what we like (or don’t like) too. Not everyone likes the beach. For someone who can’t swim well, a surf beach might feel intimidating, so there is a whole lot of fear tied up in a trip to the beach. But for people who can swim and surf, a surf beach can feel exciting. So education and context is also a factor.
I know not everyone loves what I do as an artist. Because people have definitely told me what they thought. And you’ve probably had negative feedback too.
I think this conversation is important and I’m so glad Elise and Ange (and many others of you) have shared about it. I feel it is especially important when you're young and when you're starting to think about your artistic career. At that point, you are growing the confidence to really put yourself out there. We can't hide behind an artwork. Once it's out there, it's out there, and our art really is an extension of our thinking that's evidenced in the world. I was lucky to have an amazingly supportive group of people at the high school I went to, and I'm still in touch with one of my art teachers from back then, and that was a very long time. ago. I went to university and it was still supportive, but less so. When, towards the end of university, I actually showed some of the work that I was doing to to an art professor. He was a journalist and an art critic as well. He was not encouraging, was not positive. He pretty much wrote off what I was making, physically turned away from me (even though we had scheduled time to talk about my work and career) and got back to doing whatever he was doing. Perhaps I caught him at the wrong time, perhaps something else was going on in his life. But the effect on me was pretty devastating.
I didn’t handle it well - because I was young, my ego was quite fragile, and I didn’t have the emotional strength that I’ve developed over time and with experience.
I didn’t handle it well - because I was young, my ego was quite fragile, and I didn’t have the emotional strength that I’ve developed over time and with experience. The experience with that art professor did steer me off an art career for a while. And I’m sad for the younger version of me that that was the case. But it turns out I’m quite resilient after all, and for me, the idea of being an artist was a bit like a weed, not a fragile rose - my weed of an art career was going to grow in whatever conditions it got.
So if this happens to you and you want someone encouraging to talk to, reach out to me directly. Just send me an email. Because I will have your back. As will the amazing @creatr.art community on Instagram.
Criticism is fine, with permission, constructive intentions and privacy.
There was a problem here, and a problem in the comments that Elise and and got on their posts. Criticism is fine. We get criticised in art school all the time and that process helps us improve. There are three HUGE differences though.
In art school we are in an environment where we are training, and asking for feedback. So we are in a space where we are giving permission to critique our work. This is part of the process. But even in art school, I never gave permission for anyone to be mean to me, and I still don’t.
Constructive criticism is amazing - I love it - it helps us build a more robust practice. Questions like ‘Have you considered this…?’, or ‘I’m not convinced about this, could you tell me more on your thinking…?’ or, ‘I think this could be stronger by doing this… what do you think?’ These are all absolutely acceptable to my mind. I still ask for this kind of feedback from the interior designers I respect and trust.
I feel any criticism needs to be done privately and with respect. Open slather in Instagram? That’s a big NO.
When we put ourselves out there, we open ourselves up for criticism.
When we put ourselves out into the world, and share who we are, we do open ourselves up for criticism. The thing about posting publicly - it is public, people believe their opinion counts, and will share negative their opinions with very little thought of the impact. I was watching a Taylor Swift documentary on Netflix the other night, because I think that she's an amazingly persistent human being and has gotten through some pretty impressive hurdles in her career. One of the things that she talked about was, if the person who is making nasty comments about what you're making isn't someone that you trust and isn't someone who you respect, then those comments don’t deserve a place in your world. I think there's a third aspect here, where, if we're an artist, if we're creative, if that person's not our customer, then I think that that's just something that we can ignore and move on. Even though people can criticise us, we choose the effect it has on us. Elise’s post above discusses this beautifully.
The thing is, not everyone is respectful, and I believe that the kind of person that will leave a nasty comment on your Instagram page is the kind of person that you really don't need in your life. When that happens to me I just delete the comment and block those people because I don't want them. They are not part of my community or my customer. I feel a bit sorry for them (not much though) and move on. On a practical level, they are a very good indication of who isn’t my Ideal Art Buyer, which is quite useful.
Find your lovers instead
Rather than focusing on the haters, focus on your lovers instead! The people who LOVE your work, plus love who you are, your unique story, those people are definitely out there. I would love to help you focus on finding more of them and made a FREE webinar that will help you discover your art lovers.
I asked a recent student for feedback (I do this A LOT!) and this is what she said:
I actually think learning how to discover my Ideal Art Buyer already made it way more clear to me who I need to be speaking to and dare I say, that is where I’ve been going wrong - oops!
Learn how to Discover Your Ideal Art Buyer
If you want to dive deeper into this, I’ve got a FREE WEBINAR that you can access to learn more, including:
Learn how to discover who other artists you respect are already selling to
Visualise and articulate who your Ideal Art Buyer is
Be able to describe your Ideal Art Buyer and target them in your art marketing.
Be confident in your next steps towards success as a Professional Artist.
The Discover Your Ideal Art Buyer webinar is 54 mins, is action based, delivers real outcomes, and includes an easy worksheet that will help you focus on what counts.